Happy Mother's Day, Mom - No Butts About It

Happy Mother's Day to my beautiful, smart and loving mom, Maralyne Monsour.

She nudged me this morning. I still get those Mom vibes. She inspired me to write this post. So here goes, Mom...help me find the words.

My mom died about three years ago. She was one of those moms. You know the kind that always make a big deal for others on their birthdays and holidays but didn't really want you to fuss around her big days. She was an amazing woman, wife, mom, grandmother, aunt, cousin, friend and fighter. She fought lung cancer for over 10 years. She was one tough cookie! And she has been the subject of a few of my posts. Here she is with our youngest. I treasure this photo as it was from my mom's last Mother's Day.

Today's is about her last moments fighting with lung cancer. Warning: This isn't my typical cheery post.

As soon as my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer she quit smoking. She had smoked since she was in high school and she stopped around age 63. After she was diagnosed she said that she brought this disease on herself - that it was her responsibility. She stopped smoking cold turkey! That is an unbelievable feat!

Yes, she was strong and firm. On quitting the habit, Mom would say,  "If you want to do something you just do it. If you have the will, you find the way." Her voice saying that phrase still lingers in my mind. I smile at her common sense, no-nonsense way of going about life. What a mentor! A modern day lady that was as tough as nails with a hug that drew you in just long enough to know she really loved you and a smile that warmed you to the core. Tough, yes, but all love.

I had the honor to be by my mom's side when she passed. Few children are so blessed. I share this next bit with you, in case you have a loved one that smokes or smoke yourself...

Watching someone die from complications due to lung cancer is extremely hard to bare. Struggling for air is the worst endeavor. I know first hand as I almost drown when I was 3 years old and that feeling still haunts me. Gasping for air and having my lungs fill with water...there's nothing so terrifying. Mom - my hero -  pulled me out of the pool and had to resuscitate me.

That terrifying feeling of not being able to breathe consumed me again on the day my mother passed. It was our ultimate bonding experience - my mother's last moments. She was struggling for air but her lungs were shot, the years of smoking and the cancer had literally sucked the life out of her -  she had pneumonia and there was nothing that could be done. Her time had come. It was an excruciatingly tough way to leave this earth.

I was blessed to be there by my mom's side. Holding her hand and praying. She was surrounded by her children and loved ones.  She was ready to go. She had beat the odds and fought a 10+ year battle. She was ready to join my dad in heaven.

So I share my mom and my last moments together with you - in my less than eloquent way - to hopefully motivate you to kick your smoking habit in the butt or to help your loved ones stop smoking.

Find tips on how to stop smoking at The American Lung Association and there's several stop smoking online groups.

Mom, thanks for keeping the inspiration coming. And for all of you that still have your mom here with you - go love on her with a hug, a call, or even a facebook post (that last one is for Heather ;))!

Fourteen Years In The Making - Meeting My Sponsored Friend #cfcatrip

I was extremely excited to meet Angelica and her family in person on Day 3 of my Guatemala CFCA awareness trip.  This moment had been 14 years in the making and the butterflies were getting the best of me as we set up video cameras and did sound checks. I'm sure there will be an outtakes clip I will share here. I was shaky at best.

Many families filed in starting around eight in the morning. There were 38 sponsors - some who sponsor more than one child or aging friend - so several families needed to check in. Though the lines were long, every Mayan had a smile on their face waiting in anticipation to meet their sponsor either for the first time or catch up since the last visit.


It is easy to tell yourself you are not going to cry when you meet your sponsored child for the first time. It's a joyous occasion and you only have a few hours so you want all smiles and no tears. Yep, the reality of that mantra lasted all of about 15 seconds for me.

I saw Angelica and her family registering and just couldn't wait to throw my arms around her and share that moment with the camera. There were lots of tears of joy and it was such a once-in-a-lifetime moment. I'll post the video as soon as I can. 

It's hard to put into words how overwhelming of a emotionally-charged moment it was. To spend time with someone you care so much about, have so much hope for and want so much for - someone you didn't think you'd ever be able to meet - I wanted to slow down time and cherish every second. And the seconds flew by!

Angelica was such a delight. Her smile - it is a treasure and it barely left her face all day. I haven't seen her smile much in photos we have gotten over the years so seeing her spirit so alive and happy was a goodness that words again can't describe. Her parents, Luis and Edilberta, are so proud of her and her little brother, Fernando, was all over her that day - just crazy for her. There was so much family love and respect for each other. What a comfort for me to see! So many acts of kindness without thought or reflection. All so apparent to me but so matter of fact for them. 

Angelica and her mother, Edilberta, made our family special gifts including the native outfit I am wearing in these photos. Their weaving is incredibly beautiful and Angelica has inherited her mother's love and gift for weaving. They are blessed to be able to help provide for their family. 

After seeing how well Angelica weaves it really hit home how difficult it must be for her family to commit to keeping her in school. She is so talented but they realize that her education will be more beneficial for the family long-term.

We were able to spend about an hour together before lunch. Angelica loves to play basketball and read so I brought her a ball and some books. We talked about school and her hopes to be a nurse. Her father, Luis, pridefully shared how Angelica juggles school work, weaving and helping her mom with chores around their home. We talked about all their family. They got me caught up on how Angelica's grandparents are doing. We discussed how Angelica's family helps take care of children in their village that need a healthy and happy home to stay in for as long as they need it due to alcoholism. This kind fact made sense of all the kids we had seen in pictures over the years. They have taken in several children. A family in need helping others. 

The morning was spent sharing a web of stories that had a few gaps given we'd known each other fourteen years but hadn't ever met. We were filling in those gaps real time with our amazing interpreter, Elena. Even with the gaps - the bond - the family-like bond was instant and steadfast strong. 

The highlight of my day after meeting Angelica was eating a traditional Mayan lunch with Angelica's family. It was nice to have time over a meal - to break bread - and not have to worry about any of the family serving on us. As a mom, it was something that really stuck with me. CFCA staff did all the waiting on and we just enjoyed amazing food and each other's company. Also, each family with their sponsor could speak in front of the whole group. Angelica's dad shared with the community our story in such a captive way. I have to say I fell in love with the prose of the Mayans that day. They know how to give heart-felt talks that are beautiful to take in. They flow like songs. And, during the program we danced together - the Mayans love music and dancing. We - Angelica and I - did a folk dance to Mayan music. That was yet another highlight of the day. 

And the best news for me - I was going to visit Angelica's family at her home in a few days so though this day came to a close too quickly at least it was just a temporary good-bye for us.

Interested in learning more about CFCA and why I chose to sponsor a child? Here's my story.

I’ll be posting recap blogs here. I'll update with video from CFCA when post-production work is finished. Many in-the-moment updates have already been posted on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest - just look under #cfcatrip.

DISCLOSURE: I was CFCA's guest blogger. They covered my flight and lodging during my Guatemala awareness trip in return for me documenting my trip via blog posts and sharing my experience via my social channels. 

Day 2 - #cfcatrip Visiting Santos and Angela´s Home

Day Two of our CFCA Guatemala Awareness Trip started at the St. James Cathedral in Guatemala City. We arrived right after Mass started so we don´t have inside footage of the beautiful transept but here´s a quick video highlighting a few key points.



We stopped at a CFCA Guatemalan sub-project to meet with sponsored families and see first hand how CFCA is providing encouragement and the means for these families to become self-sustaining as they build a path out of poverty.

We were welcomed with open arms and joyous hearts by over 100 families cheering our arrival. All the families love seeing Mr. Bob - Senor Roberto, founder of CFCA.

The goal of today for me was to experience first hand how we, as CFCA sponsors, walk with families on the path out of poverty via sustainable projects and education. We visited two family homes. It was humbling. 

This is my first CFCA trip The need is everywhere, the poverty is grave. It immediately became overwhelming for me (as I am a fixer) but the joy and love shines through stronger than the need - there is not despair in the eyes of the community, there is something stronger that is very hard to explain. There´s a spark in these Mayan eyes - a spark of hope, faith, respect and admiration. 

But then again, it hits me...
So much poverty. And I say this to Bob and he answers "so much hope." 

And I say, "With so much need, how do you make an impact?"  and Bob responds, "One family at a time." 
 
Seeing the sustainable programs in action in the community helped me understand how to see the tree of hope (one family at a time) through the forest of poverty. 

So much hope. So much love. So much respect.

In the first home, the family greeted us at the door with big hugs. The warmth this family expressed for Judy-Anne, Luis (CFCA Guatemalan Communication Liason), Maria (CFCA social worker for this community) and me was overwhelming. The father, Santos, was so proud of his two sponsored daughters, Marta and Ingrid. He very eloquently told us how incredibly talented they are. He was such a proud dad and his daughters and wife lit up as he told us stories about his daughters.

He shared how Marta is a leader in her school and takes care of goats and chickens (purchased with help from CFCA´s sustainable program) to help her family with additional income. Ingrid is shy and very intelligent. She loves going to school and wants to be a teacher.

Angela, the mother, talked about how the family is very active with giving back to the community through CFCA. Maria told me she picked Angela´s family for us to meet with because Angela is so involved with giving back to the community and Santos´ work ethic is well known throughout this area of Guatemala.

Angela shared that our visit was so special to their family that her husband took the day off work in the fields to greet us. He works Monday-Saturday 7a-7p (not including his 20-40 minute commute - walking to the fields). I wanted to ask when he had time to build their home including figuring out how to wire it for electricity - for lights.

Marta gave us a tour of their home that Santos built by himself - tin roof, concrete block basis, cornstalk walls and dirt packed floors. The one same table they have is used for many things but most importantly for Marta to do her homework. They have lights so she can study at night after her chores are finished including watching her younger siblings.

I´ll update this blog with video footage that Judy-Anne and Luis captured (post trip) so you can really see Santos and Angela´s family´s love for each other and CFCA and most importantly, how step-by-step they are walking the path out of poverty.
 

Interested in learning more about CFCA and why I chose to sponsor a child? Here's my story.

While I’m in Guatemala, I’ll be posting recap blogs with video here on this blog and in-the-moment updates on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest.

DISCLOSURE: CFCA is covering my flight and lodging for my Guatemala mission awareness trip in return for me documenting my trip via blog posts and sharing my CFCA awareness trip experience via my social channels. 
 

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Day 1 #cfcatrip - Dile Hola a Guate!

Judy-Anne Goldman, CFCA Multimedia Manager, and I started today at MCI in Kansas City around 3a. A bit blurry eyed from lack of sleep but thankful that the winter storm passed us, here's a brief video kicking off our Guatemala (Guate) adventure.

Our flight from Atlanta to Guate had boarded when we landed in ATL so we dashed to get on it and here's the gorgeous view during our descent into Guatemala City. 

Yes, we went from 10 degrees to 85 degrees in about 6 hours. The CFCA staff met us at the airport along with other sponsors. I think all told there's about 35 sponsors on this trip. We'll be sharing some of their stories throughout our trip and we have a talkative crew so we'll continue sharing stories here for as long as this crew wants. 

As soon as we arrived at our hotel, we met with Dave and four generations of family members from his sponsored daughter, Evelyn (more of Dave's story coming in a sponsors´stories compilation post) but here's a pic to show the amazing emotional bond Dave has with Evelyn whom he has been sponsoring for 14 years.  Evelyn's father died when she was two years old and Dave started sponsoring her shortly after. I felt honored to be part of their conversation. To see the mutual love and respect they had for each other. This special bond through sponsorship took my breath away. 

This afternoon we worked out connectivity issues and took in this incredible sunset. 

We have an insanely beautiful sunset video to share but we need to do some post production so we'll post it later. The whole CFCA crew joined Bob and Cristina Hentzen for our first awareness trip dinner where Chico and Brenda, our staff leads, welcomed us with open arms and treated us to a fantastic Guatemalan feast. Mucho gusto!

What I am learning first hand is every sponsor has a very different yet very similar sponsorship story. Different circumstances on why they are sponsoring but how they feel is very much the same. It's the relationship they have with their sponsored child that defines the how - there is a bond that can only be created in a hand up, heart-filled way that is defined by CFCA's mission. 

Say hello to Guate! Buen viaje!

Interested in learning more about CFCA and why I chose to sponsor? Here's my story.

DISCLOSURE: CFCA is covering my flight and lodging for my Guatemala mission awareness trip in return for me documenting my trip via blog posts and sharing my mission awareness experience via my social channels. 

CFCA Trip - A Little Bit of Info About CFCA

Thanks for giving me some wonderful ideas on what I should share with you while on my CFCA awareness trip to Guatemala. A couple of you asked me to share a little bit more about CFCA, so here's a video highlighting CFCA's founders and a quick financial overview.

This is the CFCA story from the founders themselves:

And you asked about CFCA's financials:

I am very happy to report that 93.7 percent of CFCA's expenses go toward program support. Details on CFCA's 2011 financials are here.

Now back to the big share...

We are going to keep the content under wraps and unfold it through out the trip. Please come back to this blog or follow me on Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest or Instagram. Everything Guatemala trip-related will be tagged with #cfcatrip.

My trip is coming right up on December 26. If you have been on a CFCA awareness trip, please connect with me on Twitter or Facebook. Also, if you have any other questions about CFCA, I'm all ears. 

DISCLOSURE: CFCA is covering my flight and lodging for my Guatemala awareness trip in return for me documenting my trip via blog posts and sharing my awareness experience via my social channels. 

CFCA Trip - What Do You Want Me To Share During My Trip?

Ok, so you know I'm headed to Guatemala for a mission awareness trip and I want to know what you would like for me to share while I'm there via this blog - the title kinda summarizes that, right?

But first, a little bit about why I'm going to Guatemala...

CFCA is a global non-profit organization headquartered in my hometown - Kansas City, Kansas. CFCA's mission is a passion of mine:

Our mission is to walk with the poor and marginalized of the world.

• We provide personal attention and direct benefits to children, youth, aging and their families so they may live with dignity, achieve their desired potential and participate fully in society.
• We invite people of good will to live in daily solidarity with the world’s poor through one-to-one sponsorship.
• We build community by fostering relationships of mutual respect, understanding and support that are culturally diverse, empowering and without religious or other prejudice.

Grounded in the Gospel call to serve the poor, CFCA is a lay Catholic organization working with persons of all faith traditions to create a worldwide community of compassion and service.

A nonprofit organization (NPO) working with persons of all faith traditions to create a worldwide community of compassion and service - if you know me well, you know this isn't just a passion but a perfect calling for me. 

You can read a bit about why John and I sponsor Angelica, teenager in Guatemala, through CFCA in this blog post.  It has been a dream of ours since we started sponsoring Angelica in 1998 to meet her through one of CFCA's mission awareness trips. The CFCA infographic below is from about a year ago and gives overview answers to common CFCA mission awareness trip questions:

With four kids and two full-time working-out-of-the-home parents we decided to put that dream on permanent hold. I began doing more local volunteering with CFCA including helping with public service announcements and fundraising events.

Last year, I became a member of CFCA's Social Media Advisory Board and was thrilled when CFCA asked me to be their first mission awareness trip social media advocate. I am going to meet Angelica - our sponsored daughter who we have been "talking" with via letters for the last 14 years! This is going to be amazing for me. I honestly don't have the words. And if technology and the local wifi holds up, I'll be sharing it with you in real-time or near real-time.

I'll also be interviewing CFCA staff and families and understanding local CFCA initiatives including micro-lending businesses (which I'm really excited about given my start-up roots).

So now that you have a little background, please let me know what you'd like to hear about and see me do while I'm in Guatemala. Judy-Anne Goldman of CFCA will be with me and we'll have a video camera and laptop in tow so we'll be ready to capture and deliver on your requests. 

DISCLOSURE: CFCA is covering my flight and lodging for my Guatemala mission awareness trip in return for me documenting my trip via blog posts and sharing my mission awareness experience via my social channels. 

CFCA Trip - Compliation Post: What I Need To Pack for my Guatemala Mission Awareness Trip

So I asked you through this blog,  Facebook and Twitter what three things I should pack for my upcoming CFCA mission awareness trip to Guatemala. You know good advice comes in threes and here's the excellent suggestions I received and am planning to pack:

• Peanut Butter - Angela Robson
• Multi-purpose wet wipes - Kerry Bettenhausen  and Erica McClenny 
• Use your phone to take pictures of any prescription bottles for meds you may take, your passport/travel docs, etc. If you misplace anything or need a prescription, get questioned about a med at customs inspection, etc. it makes things so much easier - Matt Ridings (#lightbulbbrilliant)
• Good shoes - Katelynn G
•  Toilet paper - Veronica
• A small bottle of pure tea tea oil - it works as natural astringent and bug repellant for scratches and bug bites - Kerry Bettenhausen  
• A Camera - Shanxi
• Crafts for the kids - Angela Robson
• Water Purifying Bottles - Erica McClenny (this was a oh-wow, they make those? suggestion for me)
• A sarong wrap - besides being a comfortable skirt, it can be used as quick robe, towel or extra blanket. - Judy-Anne Goldman
• Sunscreen - Veronica
• Liquid bath soap - Judy-Anne Goldman
• A light jacket/sweater for evenings - Katelynn G
• Medicine - Veronica
• Comfortable clothing you can mix and match over several days - Shanxi
• Jake Jacobson is letting me borrow his Garmin Forerunner so I can share with you where I've traveled every day of my trip - Thanks, Jake! - Jake Jacobson
• And my favorite - Matt's Travel Gear Pinterest Board (lots of great ideas for all your travel).

 Thanks to everyone for all the great ideas around question number one! 

I don't leave for Guatemala until December 26th so keep the suggestions coming. My next CFCA post will be question number two as I crowdsource my way to prepping for this wonderful trip.

Find out more about why I'm going to Guatemala on my personal CFCA page.

DISCLOSURE: CFCA is covering my flight and lodging for my Guatemala mission awareness trip in return for me documenting my trip via blog posts and sharing my mission awareness experience via my social channels.